This Week

Went to tea - drank too much.
Went to a bar - drank too much (Monkey Shine daiquiri tastes like bananas, not like monkeys. Still delicious.)
Laughed and hung out with friends and family at my fabulous 50's themed bridal shower.
Smoked candy cigarettes with our pregnant friend.
Went to the store to buy cheese and bandaids.
Watched Corner Cupcakes kick ass on "Cupcake Wars."
Went to gym - came home angry (about having to go to the gym).
Scanned a hundred million photos. Found picture of Justin's mullet in elementary school. Laughed so hard I almost peed a little.
Sent wedding contracts.
Gave dogs bubble wrap - spent the night cleaning little bits of plastic out of the carpet.
Googled "Karate Kid" themed weddings - found nothing.

Thanks For The Ta-Ta's!

Ready to see the best baby gift EVER?

It's a BOOBIE BEANIE...


For moms to put on their babies while they breastfeed!

How awesome (and slightly awkward) is that?

And ready for the best part?

IT COMES IN DIFFERENT COLORS!!


For boobies of all different races!
Wow...they really did think of everything...

Get a boob on Etsy

At least she tries...

Mom: What does "sched" mean?
Me: What are you talking about?
Mom: Auntie emailed me and said she has to check her "sched"
Me: It means "schedule." Sched ... you know, short for schedule.
Mom: I have never heard of that in my life. Is that what's cool now? Shorthand?
(Cue sound of head hitting wall.)

Then a few days later I get this e-mail from my mom:

hi bb!

now let me get this st. how partic is the navy bas?

do they need the full nam or just the first and last nam? cuz

if they need the full nam, i or u may sent out a mass email with

all the nams typed on it.

how cool am i, i short it.

I e-mailed her back and said:
It doesn't count as shorthand when you randomly take out letters. Most of those words don't even make sense!
p.s. Only Vietnamese fobs use the word "nam." Like "Hey guh! What your nam?"